Real quick- I went to a Mexican restaurant with my mom today, El Meson of Freehold. We noticed a Zagat review hanging on the wall with the phrase, “BYO-cum-market”. Excuse me? What does this mean and why am I eating somewhere whose review includes the word cum?
No I haven’t seen that show with Emmy Rossum and William H. Macy that everyone has been raving about, and I probably won’t.
The shamelessness that I am referring to in this post is my own. I don’t often post a lot of pictures of myself, but that’s not for lack of calculated self- portraits taken on my phone. In true girl fashion, I love playing with makeup and clothes, coming up with different looks, and generally transforming into anyone other than myself. Ignoring whatever psychological implication that last statement has, it’s fun. So this is just a little moment for me to sit in the spotlight. I was in dire need of a selfish, vain moment without consequences.
Some of my friends and I have taken up the best little hobby recently. We go to talk shows. The tickets are free, and there is the potential to get swag, be near celebrities, and be on tv. WHY HAVEN’T I DONE THIS SOONER? Our first daytime television endeavor was abc’s new show The Revolution. I had high expectations because one of the five hosts is Tim Gunn, who I adore. However, things were a little chaotic. Our taping was hours off schedule and the only way they could convince people to stay was to offer (mediocre) pizza and pay us out with forty bucks cash. Seeing as I have no income and it cost $25 just to get into the city, I took their offer, as did my friends. After waiting around in a cold basement for what felt like an eternity, we were finally sent into the studio and taping began. This show was a mess. It was so drawn out and it was very clear that it was a new show that hadn’t quite found its footing. I hope they get it together because as of now it feels like it was just slapped together. Aside from the many bumps in the road during the taping, the show itself just did not grab me. Maybe it was just our episode “Sweat and Debt”, but I was not impressed. The debt segment was especially disappointing because their guest was a consultant who was just plain mean to the woman she was trying to advise. Instead of saying, that vacation with your son may have to wait awhile, she just said, that ain’t gonna happen. She didn’t really offer any advice, she just told the woman that she was doing everything wrong. Ugh, she made my skin crawl. The worst part was that I had to watch this episode when it aired to look for myself in the audience, obviously. I guess it was all worth it considering they must have put me and my friend Amanda on screen at least five times. It was hilarious. They used the worst camera angle and the lighting took me from porcelain to blinding white, but I’ll take it!
I think the show itself seems more disastrous in retrospect, especially after yesterday when I went to a taping of The Chew. It was just so much more exciting, well put together, and entertaining, and it’s on the same network. I had seen a few episodes of The Chew and I thought it was okay, of course I loved Clinton Kelly from What Not to Wear fame, but the other hosts didn’t really do anything for me. That changed yesterday though. Even though we had the worst seats in the house and got the worst of everything, the experience was still infinitely better than The Revolution. I’m pretty sure we won’t be on tv, but we got free Jacques Torres chocolate, and a pussy cat dolls workout dvd which I may or may not try after this post…The hosts were extremely friendly as were all of the crew members. The executive producer Gordon Elliot’s dulcet voice enchanted my friends, I myself was curious about DJ Ethan who I may have agreed to a blind date with…well, in my head at least. It was just so much fun and I can’t wait to go back and be a taster! A select few get to actually try everything that the hosts make and they are definitely on tv, soooooo that’s clearly where I need to be.
I have been bitten by the daytime television bug! I want to hit ‘em all up, Martha, The View, Dr. Oz, Rachael Ray…the list goes on. I think of it as taking advantage of unemployment. My next stop is a late night one, that’s right Jimmy Fallon, watch out! Some very experienced audience members are headed your way come February. Can’t wait!
I’ve decided to completely succumb to my love of wordplay. Even though I fully recognize that it is positively Carrie Bradshaw-esque, I couldn’t help but wonder, what have I got to lose? Hence the name of this post: Yearnin’ for a Returnin’! I am also comforted by the fact that no one reads this blog. Even in its heyday i.e. Spring 2010 when I had adventures that I thought were truly blogworthy, viewership was dismal. While those days are long gone, I have decided to redefine ‘adventure’ and ‘blogworthy’. Between then and now I’ve had some conventional adventures such as spending a month in Turkey which I regrettably did not write about. I’ve also had some experiences which can be filed under the new kind of adventure, i.e. 7AM Wednesday mass in Boston…that would’ve been a great entry.
Maybe this is coming from some post-collegiate need to be creative, or maybe I’m looking to beef up my resume with legitimate knowledge of wordpress. Either way, I’m glad to be doing this again. I typically doubt my written skills and voice despite the excellence I claim to execute according to my resume, but deep down I know I’m not complete shit. That’s right, I believe in myself sometimes, and le blog is uncensored! Huzzah!
I decided not to change the name le blog despite being so far removed from everything that le blog was supposed to be. Even though a lot has changed in my life and in the world since then, I still think it’s a great name, and I’ll never not want to be just a little bit french.
So where am I now? Currently in New Jersey…living at home…..JOBLESS! The plight of the college graduate is so dismal these days, there’s a big part of me that wishes I could go back in time just to tell my 18 year old self to go to Rutgers and screw Northeastern. I would still be unemployed, but I would also be debt free. That kills me. Of course if I hadn’t gone to Northeastern, I surely would have regretted it, never had the experiences, blah blah blah. I’m far enough removed from college that it takes more than a passing thought to get me nostalgic. It’s funny how that can happen in only a month.
I’m caught somewhere between wanting a job and wanting nothing more than to actually jump inside the T.V. and shake Kim Kardashian for being such an idiot for calling Khloe a troll…I’m going to be completely honest about my interests these days. E! is on all day. It’s what I call the Kardashian Vortex. It’s honestly worth an entire post so I think I’ll save it for another day, but in the meantime I’ll just say that I can’t help but get sucked in.every.time.
Honestly I do want a job, I can’t stand living off of my parents and being bored out of my mind all day, hence the return to le blog. I definitely thrive in a work environment and I guess I’m just waiting for the right opportunity to present itself, which is a completely idiotic approach to getting a job. At least I realize this. I just need to send out the barrage of resumes and cover letters, and I will…one day…soon…but not tomorrow.
A huge part of the problem is that I have no idea what I want to do. I know what I’m qualified to do and I know what I would probably be good at, but it still seems a little unfulfilled. Am I really supposed to spend the rest of my life behind a desk? It just doesn’t seem like me, or at least the me that I see, especially the me that I see in five or ten years. So here’s hoping that “So where do you see yourself in five years?” is not one of my interview questions for Administrative Assistants R US.
It’s difficult to figure all of this out, but wasn’t that why I went to Northeastern? I have experience but all those internships taught me, really, was what I don’t want to do. I need to be in a creative industry. That’s the best I’ve got so far.
Oh 12:20 AM, how you’ve changed over the years. I can only hope that you will once again be the hour of panic and nervous breakdown as you were for the majority of my college years. That was the 12:20 that I like to remember. Burnt out, silently slamming my head against the wall so as not to wake my roommate, and pulling genius out of my ass. Here’s hoping.
Le blog, it feels good to be back!
